8 tips on what to do when his ex won’t leave him alone

Posted by: b3rrilyn in GIST Jan 24, 2014

We’ve all had those relationships that involve dealing with a seemingly��crazy” ex-girlfriend�who don’t leave your new boo alone. She either, a) thinks there’s a chance that they’ll get back together, or, b) just wants to sabotage your relationship because she’s jealous. Whatever the reason is, trying to maintain a happy, new relationship while the past keeps coming back to haunt your BF�is NOT fun.�

But here’s the thing: we need to remember that that �crazy” ex-girlfriend is just a person who is dealing with�a lot of emotional issues… she’s just dealing with them in�the wrong way.�To make an awkward situation a little better, you need to be the one who acts rational, otherwise you’re going to have all sorts of drama. If you want her to leave you two alone for good, here are�8 tips on what to do when his ex-girlfriend won’t go away:�

Put Yourself In Her Shoes

I know this is hard because this girl is probably driving you crazy, but stop for a second and try to put yourself in her shoes. Imagine what she must feel like: she’s probably acting this way because she’s heartbroken and not yet over her ex. Yes, she’s dealing with it the wrong way, and yes, she’s not being nice to you, but you sort of have to feel sorry for her. She’s SO upset that she’s acting really immature. Imagine how you feel after a breakup and how you would feel seeing your ex with someone else if you weren’t yet over him. It stinks and that could be why she’s acting so irrational.

Ignore The Situation Completely

Before you do anything else, try to just ignore her completely. Sometimes, ignoring someone who is trying to get to you is the best way to deal with the situation. It shows them that you don’t care and you have better things to do than think about that person. Act like it’s not happening and go on with your life. If this doesn’t work, keep reading!

Talk To Him About It

If the whole thing is really bugging you, you need to talk to your boyfriend about what’s going on. Tell him how his ex is making you feel and let him know you’re not comfortable with her being around him or talking to him. Be honest with him and talk about this as a couple, so that you can get through it as a couple. He needs to know how you’re feeling.

Ride It Out For A While

This may just be a situation you need to deal with for a little while, so be prepared to ride it out if needed. You don’t need to deal with it FOREVER, but it may take a few weeks before things get cleared up. Hopefully his ex will see what she’s doing is wrong and will get her act together on her own.

Don’t Try To Make It Worse

I know it’s tempting to try and make her more jealous by posting kissing pictures on social media where you know she’ll see them or making statuses like, “SOOOO in love, he doesn’t care about you anymore :)” but… don’t. Try to restrain yourself. Doing stuff like this is definitely going to make her mad and you don’t know how she’ll react. It will just make the situation worse. Take the high road!

Ask Him To Say Something To Her

If things are really getting out of hand and you can’t take it anymore, ask your boyfriend to speak up and say something to his ex. Before you say something, he should – after all, he is the one who has a past with her. Tell him exactly how you feel and let him know it’s putting a strain on your relationship. Ask him to talk to her and tell her she needs to stop and make his feelings clear.

Don’t Do Anything Dramatic

Want to take matters into your own hands? Okay, but don’t do anything crazy or dramatic, like starting a public fight or saying something nasty over Facebook. This is only going to make things worse and will cause even more problems.

Talk To Her In A Mature Way

Instead, handle things in a mature way. Ask her if you two can meet up in person so that you can talk. Or, send her a message on Facebook that isn’t full of threats or curses or accusatory statements. Just be honest with her: tell her you don’t like whatever she’s doing, you’re happy in your relationship and you would appreciate it if she moved on and stayed away from both of you. Be firm and get your message across. Hopefully, it will make her realize she needs to stop.

Written by: Jessica Booth